Aaron has been battling a kidney stone for the past 2.5
weeks. More doctor visits. More medications. More procedures. More not feeling
good. More pain. At first I was worried blood in the urine meant the cancer
medication was doing a number on his liver or kidneys, so having it be a stone
was actually good news (if we are looking for the silver lining here). This was
the first time Aaron had to have a stone blasted. I would describe the blasting
procedure as basically being punched in the side 4,000 times. Lithotripsy is
the technical term. Now we wait for all those stone fragments to pass.
I have thought a lot about stones. Stones and bread. One
night, at the beginning of this cancer journey, these scriptures popped into my
head:
“…what man is there of you, whom if his son ask bread, will
he give him a stone?
“Or if he ask a fish,
will he give him a serpent?
“If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto
your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good
things to them that ask him?”
Matthew 7:9-11
I went to the Bible and read the entire chapter and realized
Aaron and I had been doing precisely what the Lord counsels us in the verses
before the stone and bread verse. He says:
“Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find;
knock, and it shall be opened unto you:
“For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh
findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.”
Matthew 7:7-8
Prior to this cancer experience, we were asking,
seeking, knocking and to the casual onlooker it could easily seem that instead
of giving us answers the Lord has handed us a stone, but this is God and He
gives good gifts.
I choose to believe that in this cancer we will find
“bread.” I think of the times bread is mentioned in the scriptures. I think of
how many religions use some type of bread to symbolize a miracle or to point us
to Christ. Bread to me is symbolic of life. The Savior himself
is known as the bread of life; the source of all spiritual nourishment. “And Jesus
said unto them, I am the bread of life: he that cometh to me shall never
hunger; and he that believeth on me shall never thirst.” John 6:35. He is in this experience with us.
I will be honest some days I am plain tired of dealing with
medical issues. I don’t want to go to one more doctor visit, dish out one more
pill, prime one more tube feed, and order one more prescription. But at the end of the day, I still believe in the the giver of all good things. I continue to ask, seek, and knock.
We are thankful to all of you who have also been in this experience with us. We can never thank you enough. The power of your faith and prayers continues to sustain us.
Lorraine, thank you for your beautiful post. For me it can be easy to forget about the blessings side of cancer. The other day a friend of mine was telling me about some of the challenges her teenage son is facing and about his trying attitude. I had a thought come very clearly to me that Steven's cancer had influenced him for the good and that he would not have the same challenges as his peers. It was probably one of the first times when I felt grateful for his cancer. And we are four years out, so you can see that it has taken me a whole lot longer than it has for you to come to some terms with the cancer.
ReplyDeleteWe pray for you guys every night. I hope you've had an enjoyable summer with your family. We sure love you.
Lorraine, thank you for your beautiful post. For me it can be easy to forget about the blessings side of cancer. The other day a friend of mine was telling me about some of the challenges her teenage son is facing and about his trying attitude. I had a thought come very clearly to me that Steven's cancer had influenced him for the good and that he would not have the same challenges as his peers. It was probably one of the first times when I felt grateful for his cancer. And we are four years out, so you can see that it has taken me a whole lot longer than it has for you to come to some terms with the cancer.
ReplyDeleteWe pray for you guys every night. I hope you've had an enjoyable summer with your family. We sure love you.
This post reminds me of a talk that was given at BYU-Hawaii by S. Michael Wilcox - not that you need it, but here it is! https://devotional.byuh.edu/node/332
ReplyDeleteBeautiful post Lorraine. We love you guys. Melissa
ReplyDeleteYou are loved and cared about by so many. You are a beautiful example of faith. Such a blessing that all we have to do is one day at a time. Always in our prayers. Love, marykaylewis
ReplyDeleteLorraine, I love reading your posts! They are full of your beautiful spirit and so much light and truth! Thank you for sharing your faith and strengthening mine.
ReplyDeleteYou are a very profound person, Lorraine. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. We think about and pray for your family often.
ReplyDeleteSure love you sweet friend. It is so uplifting and brings such knowledge to my own testimony reading your blog. Thank you for keeping us updated.
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